hello (:
“But if you ever bring her back damaged again — and I don’t care whose fault it is; I don’t care if she merely trips, or if a meteor falls out of the sky and hits her in the head — if you return her to me in less than the perfect condition that I left her in, you will be running with three legs. Do you understand that, mongrel?”
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ppda test comin up in 2wks, HAIYO WORRIED. o wells. the most screwed up core i would say, dun even dare to comtemplate how i would fare for the rest. and i need to prove it that i can.
i really hope it is a good thing, i can't bear another blow i'm afraid it'll rip my heart apart.the night when i was forced into makin a decision, i cried like i nvr did over the phone because it really pained my heart so so much. although veh much didnt want to let terence know, eventually i caved in because the heartache and pain was far too unbearable. almost went to the extent of kneeling down. through that night, i realised how much everything meant to me and how so important it was that losing any part of it will tear me apart into pieces. i might even land in a state of "how are you goin to break my heart when it wasnt even whole to start with?". i dun understand how they can make it sound so easy and painless, and it disgusted me so greatly with the unreasonable reason that i was more disappointed than angry. trampling on my feelings as if they were worthless aint really the best way out for me. cornering me and trying to make me do things their way only worsens everything. and looking at the way me and terence broke down over the phone was the last straw for me. i felt so guilty scared upset and pained, but at the same time i was touched at how much it all meant to him as well. thrashing everything out on sunday afternoon did salvage matters a bit, i felt stronger. somehow this whole issue had strengthened the faith and belief in me to hold on tight to what i believe. and i know i will (: that is if you wont give up. if the road ahead is not so easy, our love will lead the way for us like a guiding star, and i'm sure we wont lose our ways no matter what <3  promise(:
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ppda test comin up in 2wks, HAIYO WORRIED. o wells. the most screwed up core i would say, dun even dare to comtemplate how i would fare for the rest. and i need to prove it that i can.
i really hope it is a good thing, i can't bear another blow i'm afraid it'll rip my heart apart.the night when i was forced into makin a decision, i cried like i nvr did over the phone because it really pained my heart so so much. although veh much didnt want to let terence know, eventually i caved in because the heartache and pain was far too unbearable. almost went to the extent of kneeling down. through that night, i realised how much everything meant to me and how so important it was that losing any part of it will tear me apart into pieces. i might even land in a state of "how are you goin to break my heart when it wasnt even whole to start with?". i dun understand how they can make it sound so easy and painless, and it disgusted me so greatly with the unreasonable reason that i was more disappointed than angry. trampling on my feelings as if they were worthless aint really the best way out for me. cornering me and trying to make me do things their way only worsens everything. and looking at the way me and terence broke down over the phone was the last straw for me. i felt so guilty scared upset and pained, but at the same time i was touched at how much it all meant to him as well. thrashing everything out on sunday afternoon did salvage matters a bit, i felt stronger. somehow this whole issue had strengthened the faith and belief in me to hold on tight to what i believe. and i know i will (: that is if you wont give up. if the road ahead is not so easy, our love will lead the way for us like a guiding star, and i'm sure we wont lose our ways no matter what <3 promise(:
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