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“But if you ever bring her back damaged again — and I don’t care whose fault it is; I don’t care if she merely trips, or if a meteor falls out of the sky and hits her in the head — if you return her to me in less than the perfect condition that I left her in, you will be running with three legs. Do you understand that, mongrel?”
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for the past three weeks, i have been feeling rather lethargic, confidence morale energy have been at an all time low since sch started. it doesnt feel like what it used to be, because i dun get excited at the thought of school anymore. i get tired easily, kinda lost the motivation to do work, and my mind drifts away so easily. i dun think anyone can actually understand how it feels, and also how i became like that because frankly speaking i have no idea why too. and i doubt anyone can help too, it's like something which only i myself can find the answer to resolve it. perhaps i have to derive a new aim or find back the motivation that used to propel me that much, but it jus gets really tiring to try to pace back. feels like i'm lagging behind, everyone's moving forward so fast that i find it hard to follow much less maintain the pace. omg i really feel tired, cant tell u how much but it's jus... a lot. am lousy at confiding in ppl actually, it's jus my habit to dwell on everything myself instead of pouring things out. and sometimes i become so pessimistic that i think it scares u. but have to say that i'm getting better at handling this already, today i'm feeling a lil bit better than ytd, and ytd i felt a lil better than the day before. and all the encouragements that i've gotten counts too, plus all the stuffs that are non sch related stuffs that unknowingly cheers me up... they all helped a great deal.
this post was supposed to come a few days earlier where i think the sianness/emoness/tiredness/giving-upness peaked, but thankfully i got lifted up from this pile of crap before it got worse. really thankful.
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for the past three weeks, i have been feeling rather lethargic, confidence morale energy have been at an all time low since sch started. it doesnt feel like what it used to be, because i dun get excited at the thought of school anymore. i get tired easily, kinda lost the motivation to do work, and my mind drifts away so easily. i dun think anyone can actually understand how it feels, and also how i became like that because frankly speaking i have no idea why too. and i doubt anyone can help too, it's like something which only i myself can find the answer to resolve it. perhaps i have to derive a new aim or find back the motivation that used to propel me that much, but it jus gets really tiring to try to pace back. feels like i'm lagging behind, everyone's moving forward so fast that i find it hard to follow much less maintain the pace. omg i really feel tired, cant tell u how much but it's jus... a lot. am lousy at confiding in ppl actually, it's jus my habit to dwell on everything myself instead of pouring things out. and sometimes i become so pessimistic that i think it scares u. but have to say that i'm getting better at handling this already, today i'm feeling a lil bit better than ytd, and ytd i felt a lil better than the day before. and all the encouragements that i've gotten counts too, plus all the stuffs that are non sch related stuffs that unknowingly cheers me up... they all helped a great deal.
this post was supposed to come a few days earlier where i think the sianness/emoness/tiredness/giving-upness peaked, but thankfully i got lifted up from this pile of crap before it got worse. really thankful.
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